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Tesla Motors Smeared [Hilariously] by Tin Hatters

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Tesla Motors Drivers Should Wear Aluminum Hats to Keep Google From Spying on Their Thoughts
Tesla Motors Drivers Should Wear Aluminum Hats to Keep Google From Spying on Their Thoughts

In case you’re wondering, the tin hatters are the ones that constantly go on about the Moon Landing and 9/11 being fake. Next on the list of conspiracy theorist targets, apparently, is Tesla Motors.

Of course, there have to be hundreds of conspiracy theories out there, and yes, men really did land on the moon, the Twin Towers were not packed with explosives, and no, the world didn’t end in 2012 (perhaps it was delayed?) In any case, it seems that the tin hatters have taken to the most-successful automobile startup in the last half-century, posting *cough* useful information on Tesla Motors.

Now that electric vehicles, powered by lithium-ion battery packs, and made by Tesla Motors, are gaining the public’s attention, it’s also gotten the tin hatters’ attention. Apparently, and I’m glad that someone has exposed the company for what it *cough* really is, Tesla Motors is run by organized-crime bosses. Wait, if that’s the truth, then why is Tesla Motors having such a tough time with its direct-sales model in a bunch of states? Must be different crime families, I guess.

What else can we glean from an informational paper stuffed under the windshield wiper blade of a Tesla Model S in San Francisco? Well, better get your tin-foil hats on, people, because Google and Tesla Motors are working together, secretly spying on Tesla Model S drivers, all 25,000 of them. Also, Tesla Motors bribed David Strickland, former head of the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) to get a five-star safety rating for the Tesla Model S. Twitter user Ryan Block posted a picture of one of these beauties…

Folks in SF are leaving anonymous flyers on Teslas exposing the "truth" about the company. Mind-blowing. cc @elonmusk pic.twitter.com/5xyJz62Mlu

— Ryan Block (@ryan) April 30, 2014

Photo credits: Ryan Block via Twitter | CycleDog / Foter / Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0)

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